Random Encounters on the Street

I haven't written in awhile because too much has been going on. I don't know where to start. In the last couple weeks I've made new friends, visited Julia and a group from Notre Dame on the farm where I'll be working in September, started dividing my working time between two clinics (Profamilia in addition to the Dermatologico), ate a typical Dominican brew called "sancocho", danced merengue, bachata, and salsa in a Colmado (general store type thing, but much much more than that) with some co-workers from Profamilia, bought a guitar, and even subjected some of my Dominican friends to watching my possibly favorite movie of all time, the Bolivian "Quién Mató a la Llamita Blanca?" in my apartment. They liked it, for the record. The movie, I mean, though I'm sure they liked my apartment too. One friend told me that I should make a map of my apartment so he and others can find their way around it. Hardy har har. At least it was affectionate teasing.

Well, I could write about any of those things, but since I don't know where to start, I'll write about something completely different. The theme of today's entry: Random Encounters on the Street. I'll start with the most brief and move on to progressively longer and more disturbing.


Random Encounter #1: "Bella"
This one isn't even an encounter so much as an odd incident. I was walking down the street, and like any normal day, got some catcalls, this time from some men playing dominoes at an outdoor art gallery on the corner near my apartment (believe it or not, dominoes is quite popular here. And it's a man's game). "Bella!" ("Beautiful") they said. "Bella!" I just kept walking and ignored them, the usual. But then the unexpected happened. I heard a woman's voice from the same art gallery: "Bella!" she said, imitating the men. When I didn't respond, she immediately followed it up with "Bella no habla a nadie." ("Beautiful doesn't talk to anyone.") Whoa! Whose side are you on, woman? I thought we mujeres were supposed to stick up for each other! I guess gringas don't count.

Random Encounter #2: Evangelist Guy
One day I was walking down the street and a small guy with a cane, about 50-something, literally just walked up to me and introduced himself without any explanation as to why. He asked where I was from and if I preferred to speak in English or Spanish. I probably should have said neither, but not thinking, I said either would do. So he spoke in English because he said he needed practice. He walked alongside me for several blocks, garbling on and on about random things, like where he lived, how many kids he had, and what church he belonged to. He also asked me some questions about myself, most of which I responded to with a one word answer such as "yes" or "no" without looking at him, just wondering when he would stop talking. Then I started getting nervous and wondering what the best way would be to get rid of him if he tried to follow me all the way back to my apartment. But then he explained that he would walk with me one more block and turn at a certain corner so he could go back to his church and preach the gospel. That was when it all became clear. He asked me if I belonged to any church. "No," I said emphatically.

"Do you believe in God?"

"No. But I bet you're going to convince me I should, right?"

"No, no, because I respect your beliefs. It's always important to respect people's beliefs."

"I respect your beliefs too, but I'm not going to join your church."

He actually dropped the subject, just saying that that was fine, he respected me, and then told me to be careful in Santo Domingo, because I could get robbed or raped. Then, on the corner before he left, he kissed my hand. Kissed my freakin hand! Who does that?! I "respectfully" removed his other hand from my other arm, and he turned the corner, hopefully never to be seen by me again.


Random Encounter #3: Rich Bitch
As I was walking back home from the gym yesterday evening, a young-ish woman just started talking to me in much the same manner as the guy with the cane, except in Spanish. "It's hot isn't it?" Yeah, I said. "Shit, I just ran out of minutes on my cell phone." Oh, shoot. Apparently she thought those openers enough to break the ice. "So, my name in Marisol. Where are you from?" Naomi, from the United States. "Oh, I just fell in love with some guy from the United States. He was from Alaska. But he went back there. His name in John." Then almost in the same breath: "I'd like to be your friend. I just moved to this part of the city and I think it's better to get to know Americans and Europeans." Why is that? "Because, you know, I like intelligent people, creative people." And Dominicans aren't intelligent or creative? "Not usually."

I guess I should have seen the warning signs that this woman was a little crazy, but I was completely thrown off guard because she was female. Sure, if a man approached me in that manner, I would immediately sense danger, but since she was female I couldn't tell what her motives were or what precautions I should take. Yes, she seemed a little off, but when she asked if I wanted to walk around with her for a bit and talk, I figured she was just lonely, and it couldn't hurt to just go to dinner with her somewhere near my apartment.

So that's what we did. On the way to the restaurant, she said, as we passed some "morenos" on the street, "I don't like Haitians, do you?" As if as a casual conversation starter. I do like Haitians, I countered. I think they're very nice people. "Oh. Well, maybe some, but not all." She moved on to a new topic: "I am getting fat. My jeans are tight. And these jeans cost like a hundred dollars!" I have never had a pair of jeans that cost a hundred dollars, I told her. "Why not?" Because I can't afford it. "Why?" Because I can't. Well, for these three months I'm earning a fair amount, but I don't have any savings. "And what about your parents? Don't you have parents?" Yes, but they don't buy me expensive jeans either. That stumped her. So she changed the topic slightly: "Oh, by the way, I'm really sorry, but I don't have any cash on me right now. I accidentally spent all that I had today. So, you can just get something to eat, but I'm not going to." That made me feel sufficiently awkward. You don't have even a cent? "No. By the way, do you think you could buy me a cell phone card, and I'll pay you back on Sunday? I'm out of cell phone minutes." Well, that pissed me off. An ulterior motive for her becoming my "friend"? I said, actually, I'd rather not lend you money. "But why not?" Because I hardly know you, and I don't like lending people money. "But it's just for a cell phone card, and I already said I'd pay you back!" I'd rather not. "It doesn't have to be a lot, it could just be 50 pesos. Are you going to do me this favor or not?" Finally, I agreed to buy her a 50-peso cell phone card, only to prevent her from bitching me out, Dominican-style. I wasn't planning on getting in touch with her again to collect the money, but it was only a little over a dollar.

By the time we got to the restaurant the mood had changed a bit. I somehow convinced Marisol to go to an inexpensive place instead of the classy restaurant she wanted me to go to, and I just ordered a club sandwich and begrudgingly shared. There was not much conversation because most of the time she was playing around with one of her two cell phones. Then I noticed she was wearing a chain with a small gold Star of David around her neck. I figured it was unlikely she was Jewish, and more likely she had no idea what the star meant. I was right. Is that a Jewish Star? I asked. "This? It's just a star. Do Jews wear these?" Yes. "You mean like people from Spain?" No, Jews. It's a religion. It was around before Christianity. "Oh, I didn't know. I'm Catholic."

Then Marisol started up a conversation with the waiter about how much of a nuisance those Haitians are. I guess that's a popular ice-breaker around here. "This country is so screwed," she said. "There's no money here, so much crime. And all these Haitians just wreaking havoc all over the place." Suddenly I felt the obligation to stand up and defend the entire Haitian race. But I didn't know where to start. I just sat there in silence, hating this woman more and more by the minute. Finally, just to see what she'd say, I asked, So how do you tell a Haitian from a Dominican? Part of me was hoping she would take offense to that, provoking her to just get up and leave, but instead she kind of went on the defensive: "Oh, well there are some white Haitians, but mostly they're really black. But I don't know, I'm just busy these days, I don't have time to talk to them." Then how do you know you don't like them? "I just know. Trust me, they cause all kinds of trouble. They're bad for this country." But you don't even talk to them. "Well, do you like people who don't shower?" If they have a good soul, yes. I don't think having a clean soul has anything to do with how much you shower. "OK, whatever, but I still don't like them." Well, I said after a pause, I just don't like people who say they don't like people who they don't even know. "Listen," she said, "I'm a cool chica. I like doing nice things for people." Yeah, nice things for white people. "No, for black people too! I'm not racist. I'm black. My mom is really dark and my dad is white, like you. I just don't like Haitians. I'm allowed to say that without being racist. I know there are Buddhists or something who say that's not true." (Yeah, totally random comment about Buddhists.) Then she brought the waiter into the debate, just to outnumber me. The waiter was as dark-skinned as any Haitian and was obviously not upper class, but he whole-heartedly supported Marisol, saying that yes, Haitians are indeed a nuisance. And he wasn't just saying it to be polite to his customers, either. If there's anything you can get most Dominicans to agree on, it's that Haitians are the scum of the earth. Well, I was outnumbered, and there was simply no more arguing.

Marisol gave me her cell phone number, but fortunately did not ask for mine, and I can only hope I will not run into her in the street ever again. Let's just say it's a good thing that my Random Encounters on the Street are not the only things I have to judge Dominicans by. I'm sure I would be much less fond of this place if it weren't for my Justicia Global friends, who I guess you could say aren't typical Dominicans, but that's not even fair. They're Dominicans too, but in different ways.

The other day I told my friend Raldy about the crazy yoga class I took here where everyone was dressed all in white, and asked if he knew why that craziness was the custom. He said, because white is supposed to symbolize purity, and I said, well yeah, I suppose that makes sense. But then he countered, "No, it doesn't make sense! There's a common conception that white represents Good and black Evil, and that's just not true. Black is not evil." He's completely right, but it has been so ingrained in my mind all my life that white is the symbol of purity that I don't always make the connection with black being seen as evil, at least not in the context of yoga.

It might be "the Buddhists" who are so fond of those Haitian rascals, but racism here extends even as far as a yoga class.